Saturday, August 16, 2008

The Best of FriedOkra: 40 Things About My Mom

Since my Mom's here helpin' me take care of my chillun' and the manor, I thought now'd be a good time to re-run this list of interesting and fun facts about her. Y'all tell me one neato thing about your Mom in the comments, okay?

1. She was a registered nurse for nearly 30 years and even though hospital scrubs came into vogue for nurses halfway through her career, she maintained her own high standard and wore her starched, ironed, traditional nurse's whites including the old-fashioned crisp white cap until her retirement.

2. Now that she's retired, she still spends a day a week at the hospital. She's a volunteer.

3. Mom's the only person I know who's willing to put in a day of unpaid labor just to get a free meal from a hospital cafeteria.

4. Mom can flat out SEW. She made me a beautiful wedding gown and veil my first time around and she even appliqued a pair of the sweetest little white satin pumps you've ever seen to go with them. She also lovingly designed and sewed a cotton jersey sleep sacque that all 5 of my sisters' children AND Bean slept in when they were babies. That's 12 years of almost constant wear, and that sacque's still hangin' in there. Builds 'em to last, she does.

5. Heck, I'll bet you she's sewn nearly a thousand little kid garments, pillows, curtains and fashions for herself and friends/family, yet she still thinks she's lousy at it.

6. Every item she's sewn has been HER LAST EVER!!, according to her. I WILL NEVER SEW ANOTHER THING!, I've heard her declare three or four times over the course of each project. Yet she just keeps dragging out that machine, time and time again.

7. And she will be the FIRST to admit that yes, she is a Glutton for Punishment.

8. Al says "her daughter is just like her."

9. Mom walks 3 miles almost every single day. Fast. And Early. If you're going to walk with her, be ready when she's ready or you WILL be left behind. And KEEP UP.

10. Mom loves to garden. She has a THING for a little plant called monkey grass. A lover of all things neat and tidy (cough*OCD*cough), she uses monkey grass as a border in her yard. Around EVERY. THING.

11. When I was six months pregnant with Bean, Mom had me out there planting little plugs of monkey grass along the borders of several paths she'd cleared in the woods behind her house. I think when the project was completed, long after I had given up and gone home, she'd planted well over 200 yards of little monkey grass plugs.

12. One every 3 feet.

13. That's some 400 plugs of monkey grass, people.

14. And 400 holes, dug into the rock-solid red clay of the South Carolina foothills.

15. My mom may have a little bit of a stubborn streak -- are you picking up on that?

16. Mom loves the scent of patchouli. But she's not a pot-smokin' hippie-freak. Ahem. Anymore.

17. However I am proud to report that she once owned a pair of the coolest lace-up, high-heeled blue suede go-go boots EVER.

18. At about that same time, she had LONG, STRAIGHT, all-one-length brown hair. All she needed was the daisy chain headband, man. Peace out, Nana!

19. But then. She cut her hair into a shag. And got these little octagonal gold-framed glasses.

20. She looked like if Billie Jean King and Carol Brady had a baby. She was CAH-YUTE, my friends.

21. Also about that time my sister was going through her David Cassidy phase. She got the shag cut too, and Mom made her this funky plaid zip-up-the-front pantsuit. My sister really DID look quite a bit like David Cassidy in that get up.

22. After that came the Dorothy Hamill craze, and my sister got a Dorothy Hamill hair cut. I was despondent that (yes, I'm coming to the part about Mom, I promise!) I did not also have a Dorothy Hamill hair cut. My mother improvised beautifully and told me that well, I had a Peggy Flemming hair-style. Good one, Mom.

23. Sadly, the blue go-go boots are long gone.

24. Mom is crafty. She once made a beautiful creche scene with Mary, Joseph and the baby Jesus out of two Ivory® Liquid bottles, some styrofoam balls, dowels, a bunch of old sewing scraps and a couple cans of gold spray paint. Jesus's hair was made of Brillo®.

25. Yes, I do still think Mom will go to Heaven even though she gave Baby Jesus a steel wool afro.

26. My Mom takes a nap after lunch every single day. Not a long one, only fifteen or twenty minutes.

27. That doesn't mean she won't lie there on the sofa for two solid hours eating peanuts and reading a book though. She's retired and her kids are grown up. She can do that if she feels like it.

28. Mom has a collection of 20 or so paperweights that have never held a single piece of paper down in all their born days. And handbells that don't get rung. Other than that, she's almost a 100% practical person. It's a strange dichotomy.

29. Mom is an organization FREAK. I haven't lived in her home for twenty years, but I can still find anything I want there in the same place it's always been. There is a place for everything and everything is ALWAYS in its place. Or else.

30. Unless it has been sold in a yard sale. Mom would slap a price tag on DAD and stick him out for the yard-salers to rifle through if she thought she could get decent money for him.

31. Mom loves the weirdest foods. Braunschweiger, beets, fried chicken livers. But she thinks sourdough bread tastes weird and won't eat it. HUH?

32. Mom has 6 grandkids (seven now!) and 2 step-grandkids. They all call her Nana, which suits her even better than Mom does, if that's possible. I'll bet you dollars to donuts she never thought her two daughters would produce so many grandbabies.

33. There's darned near nothing my Mom loves more than a good footrub. She used to con me into playing "podiatrist" when I was a kid. Bean and I are SO playing that game when she's old enough!

34. I believe Mom may have the teeny-tiniest hint of a crush on Alton Brown.

35. Favorite Momisms, with contributions from my sister Jackie:

Oh Balderdash!
I have told you UMPTEEN times...
(You know she's had it up to HERE with something when she yells this one.)
My stars and garters...
Good MOR-niiiiiiiiiiiiing!
Oh Good GRIEF!
or just GOOD GRIEF!

36. According to my sister, in a nutshell, Mom is resilient, long suffering, loyal, and a truthteller.

37. I'll go along with those and add that she's also organized, efficient, inquisitive, independent, trustworthy and smart. (Make a good Boy Scout, she would!)

38. I have it on good authority she thinks her daughters turned out pretty well, too.

39. If I could change one thing about Mom, I'd make her love and appreciate herself half as much as I do.

40. I hear her down there starting to re-organize my basement. Time to go!

Originally posted August 2007.

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  1. My mom is the MOST natural mother in the world. She was born to do it. She loves us kids with her whole heart and has given us everything, including the shirt off her back at times. She would sacrifice anything for us. She has been our constant cheerleader and support and encouraged us to reach for our dreams, at any age, and given us the tools to that. Mom's are awesome and they really make us who we are. Heather and Cami

  2. I believe I need to see a picture of this baby sacque. Please?

  3. Wonderful tribute to your Mom - she sounds awesome!

  4. I think the best part about my mom is how much of her I see in myself (both good and bad). Sometimes we butt heads about it, and I certainly think that she's more sensitive to my critical words than most other people (and vice versa) but we also know one another because we are so similar. That, and I love that if there is a crafty projec to be done, she'll have the best ideas about how to do it!

  5. Your Mom sounds great! I want to see a picture of her with Bean and Peanut. I'd also like to see monkey grass. I remember wondering about monkey grass the first time you posted this!

  6. The one thing I remember about my mom from growing up was that no matter how angry she got with me, she never raised her voice. Ever. She was the picture of calm. Oh, to be that way with my own children...

  7. My mom never gave up on me even when others kept telling to. She said she always knew I would pull out of it and I did.

  8. If y'all are very much alike, I imagine that she also has a pretty good sense of humor! I know you're enjoying having her there. She sounds great.

  9. She is organizing your basement? May I borrow her briefly?

  10. Don't forget that she also sewed your Bridesmaid's dresses, too. She also was a wonderful second Mom to your red-headed BFF - we even got to build gi-normous blanket tents in your family room on that wonderfully deep and shaggy yellow carpet.

    Let's see I also remember a white enamel "Irigato" on the dining room wall - we never could figure that one out could we?!

    My mom is just wonderful, too. She will drive 2.5 hours to pick up my kids, take them back to her house (another 2.5 hours), and keep them for the weekend so that Topher and I can have some "us" time. Even though she is almost 70, but still plays tennis - alot - like 3 different leagues. And we are great friends, and we talk almost every day (sometimes even twice). I love my mom!!!

  11. Your mom sounds great! How lucky you are to have here there with you...organizing your things n' such :)

  12. I want to see pictures of Nana with Bean and Peanut too! :)

    My mummy is luffly. She's probably my best friend. She's ever so like me in lots of ways (or should that be, I'm ever so like HER?). We look a lot alike. We have the EXACT same vocal cords, and even my brother and my dad can't tell us apart on the phone. I love her!

  13. That's so sweet. I hope you show her this blog. My grandmother was "Nana" and my mother is "Granny". (her choice)

    My dad is "PAW" and that's the name my son made for him and we've kept it. He figured out Grandpa is "PAW" He pointed and shouted "PAW,PAW". The name stuck ever since.

  14. What a sweet tribute to your mom. She sounds like a wonderful lady.

    My mom is a giver. She loves to find things for you that you need--maybe that you didn't even know you need, but they're perfect. I have hardly bought my kids any clothes since they've been born because she is their personal shopper.

  15. She loved John Denver and lemon icebox pie. (not necessarily in that order)

  16. Every child could benefit from such a Nana!

  17. My mom is an RN too! She was an ER nurse for many years (used to tell us all the gory details over dinner), then a floor supervisor, and is now a case manager. She worked part-time till we kids all left home, then full-time. She is a get-it-done kind of person who does my mending every time she visits.

    Thank heavens for mamas...

    Blessings to the new Mama of two!


  18. Hmm... my mom is many things. She likes to take up new hobbies. One year she decided on cake decorating, so to practice, she made EVERY RELATIVE IN CREATION their very own beautiful birthday cake. This worked out well because a few years later, she made my wedding cake. Her newest hobby is quilting. She has made my daughter 3 quilts (and she just turned 3) plus at least that many for each of her other 7 grandchildren. Do I have one? Nope - I even designed it myself. She thinks it is too plain. Well, I was trying to be nice! LOL

  19. She would sacrifice anything for us. She has been our constant cheerleader and support and encouraged us to reach for our dreams, at any age, and given us the tools to that.