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Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Because, No, I'm Still Not Desperate Enough to Clean Anything

(Hee hee hee. Anonymous, I don't know who you are but you just made my day!)

Have ya written your thank you notes from Christmas yet?

I'm supposed to be writing mine righthisveryminute (I've been supposin' to be writin' 'em for about 2 weeks now, who's kiddin' who?) but you know what? All my lack of motivation to blog evaporated RIGHT QUICK when I headed for the stationery bin.

And heeya I is, y'all!

Ah, procrastination - amazing how much I get done when there's one thing I really DO NOT WANNA DO parked smack-dab at the top of the Well-and-Truly-Way-Past-Due List. Back in college, my dorm room, en suite bathroom and halfway down Ramsay 200 hall used to miraculously become sparkling clean a couple days before my exams started. And every pencil within a 5 mile radius would be sharpened to a perfect infinite point. Mama didn't like to study. Mama doesn't like to work on anyone else's schedule, is the real problem.

(Mama has Issues With Authority.)

And so, instead of writing those pesky thank you notes, here I sit, writing a post about not writing my thank you notes. The ultimate rebellion. But let's see, if I were to write them, how about, say, something like this?

(Insert Imagination Sequence music here.)

Dear _________________,

I hope the New Year's off to a great start for you and your family. Here at FriedOkra Manor, we're still stuck back in 2007 because a pesky stomach bug Thanksgiving weekend followed by 5 weeks (and counting) of glorious retching and gagging put us significantly behind in our celebration schedule. While I imagine you are anxiously anticipating the coming long weekend in celebration of Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, we're just now gearing up to bake cookies for Santa. We hope to get Christmas wrapped up by Valentine's Day though, because we're thinking of celebrating our own MLK Day on Easter, so we'll have time for Easter by Mother's Day and Mother's Day on Father's Day and Father's Day on July 4th. Rightly or wrongly, we have chosen to postpone Memorial Day until next year for fear our Labor Day will run into next Thanksgiving and we'll have to serve potato salad and baked beans with our turkey, which, as you know, would be just plain wrong.

My point being that I realize my thank you notes from Christmas (by YOUR calendar) are tardy. I'd scheduled to write them right after we celebrate Independence Day in August, but we recently found out that the baby is due August 8th, so that will likely slow things down a bit. Looks like the FriedOkra family thank you notes from Christmas 2007 will be mailed sometime in early 2009, as long as we can remember what you gave us. And we are in our 40s, after all.

But we do intend to get back on the standard schedule for the 2009 holidays starting with President's Day, as we're going to take a week off in early February to go back and celebrate the preceding 2009 holidays (since we'll be wrapping up Christmas 2008 in January of 2009) and celebrate Memorial Day from 2008.

And that's why I'm writing! To tell you that you and your family are all invited to our Memorial Day 2008 Backyard Barbecue and End of Summer Pool Party on Saturday, February 7, 2009 at 4:00 pm right here at FriedOkra Manor, on the patio. Bring your own lawn ch-ch-ch-chairs and towels, food and b-b-b-beverages will be provided for the whole f-f-f-family.

See ya'll there!

Warmest regards,

The FriedOkras


Do y'all think that'd get me off the hook?

Sigh. Okay, well then I guess I'd better get to sharpening all these pencils.

23 comments:

  1. Hope you're back to normal soon... when the morning sickness is over, you'll probably go into overdrive for awhile, and get all caught up. That's the "second trimester wind," you know.

    My advice is, print the appropriate parts of that post, sign and address. It will give friends and family a good laugh. :)

    Jen

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  2. Oh Jen, I hope you're right! It's going to have to be a heck of a wind, the second one, because I have a lot of catching up to do. :)

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  3. Hilarious! Thanks for the laugh - I NEEDED it! And I'm with Jen - print it out and send it. I'd love to get that thank you note.

    Hope you're doing ok and feeling well. Want to send you an email -- will do so when I'm able to get down to the local coffee house for a better internet connection :-)

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  4. Megan, you should TOTALLY print and send those. Your family and friends - who know you even better than we do (if that's possible) - would get such a kick out of it. Do it! Do it!

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  5. It's great to hear from you again! I can so relate and I'm not even pregnant. But I do have a toddler and I'm in my 40s, so I can imagine and can seriously sympathize!

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  6. Giggle giggle snort snort, that was a laugh that I needed today!

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  7. You are so funny! I think you should send some of them out. If your family is anything like you they have a great sense of humor and will get a good laugh from them!
    PS - Glad you posted.I was thinking about you today and was going to send an e-mail to check on you. That blasted morning sickness!

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  8. Oh Megan, you crack me up! Sorry your still counting the wretchin' and gaggin' days. Good to know your sense of humor is still intact!

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  9. I just committed one of my worst pet peeves and now I have to correct my last post with a red pen...you're. Can you say, dork?

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  10. Ahhhh...Procrastinating! My FAVORITE pass-time....which is why I have so much time to blog....

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  11. You crack me up! Do you think you'll be able to squeeze in Christmas Eve for 2008 --according to my calendar? Or will I have to wait until March to host it?

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  12. You do have a nack of makig one laugh at your demise. I'm with the others print them out & send away, your fmaily & friends will understand.
    By the way will you give out directions to the back yard BBQ? I'm looking forward to that!!!

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  13. oh Megan....I have sooooooooooooo missed you, but this.....this was sooooooooo worth the wait. You rocked it.

    Great post!

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  14. Aaaannddd, she's back! Or at least for today the ole FriedOkra is making an appearance.

    Hmmm... if you move that Memorial Day End of Summer party to some island in the Caribbean I'll be there!! One of us just has to win the lottery before then.

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  15. Yeah, that's something I've been meaning to do as well. I use the baby as an excuse, ha ha. After all, a 3-month old does require a lot of attention.

    I hope you're feeling better!

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  16. I would send it. Especially to the sibllings and parents. They will get a major kick out of it, as did we all in Bloggy world.
    Hope you are feeling better, and that it keeps up. Nothing is worse than trying to function while feeling nasty.

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  17. Can I puh-leeez borrow this post, 'cause it would be just laugh out loud funny if it weren't for the fact that my ears are buzzing with the very loud mocking, coming from the half-written thank you notes piled up HIGH all around me at the very desk where I now sit to read blogs...and I could well, go sit at the other desk to read blogs, but well then I'd have to contend with the giant pile of Christmas cards that didn't get sent and the adoption announcements. I might even have to cleanin' sumthin'...oh but I already cleaned the bathrooms today. No kiddin'

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  18. I wrote my thank you notes YESTERDAY, but will they make it to the rightfully thanked?
    Feeling your pain (but not your nausea!)...

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  19. Darn it, Megan, I have been successfully remaining in denial about the thank you note routine until you had to go and REMIND ME!

    Thank you so very much.

    I only have to write them for myself and the two youngest, but I have to OVERSEE the process for five other people, so we may be looking at 2009 as well.

    Darn it.

    ;)

    Jeanne

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  20. HaHaHa! Now that's a thank you note I'd like to receive! Craft project for today is set: let kiddos scribble and sticker over my sloppy handwriting and send those Christmas thanks ASAP!

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  21. My computer blew up a while back, and it took with it all of the blogs in my favorites section. I was so excited when I saw that you commented on Beck's blog and I was able to find your blog, again.

    I've missed a lot! Congrats on the new baby.

    And cheers to tardy thank you's. We left town 3 days after Christmas. During the snowstorm that delayed our trip, I composed all of my thank you's and mailed them out the morning that we left.
    Only to find 1/2 of them waiting for me when we returned home a week later. Return to Sender. Insufficient postage. Wrong Address. Arrggh!

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  22. I am with you girl!!! I was such a good procrastinator when it came to studying. Obviously, it followed me into adult life since 2years after my wedding and I am still not done with my thank yous. When is late too late??? What makes it worse is that I worked in invitations & stationery and proper ettiquette was supposed to be my life. What's a procrastinator to do?

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Thoughts?