I wrote this post for my pregnancy diary on September 30, 2004 - Just a little over two weeks before I went into labor and delivered my sweet Bean. I'll be sharing a few other birth-related posts this month leading up to her THIRD birthday on the 17th, namely my own Two Pink Lines story and Beanie's birth story, along with the letters I've written her on each of her two birthdays so far. Then I'll post her third Birthday Letter on the Big Day. I hope y'all will enjoy reading these posts as much as I know I'll enjoy writing and sharing them with you!
It's October! It's October! This is the month in which, with any luck, our little one will finally get herself out here for us to hug and kiss and hold and feed and dress in all of her adorable clothes and put teeny tiny diapers on and struggle through sleepless nights with! Man oh man did September CREEP by! The 10 days between my birthday and the last day of September have seemed like their own separate trimester. Shew!
I'm still pretty comfortable at almost 38 weeks along. My only physical complaints are the awkwardness of the belly, the breathlessness and the fatigue. Mentally, the waiting's getting tough and I'm very anxious to actually have her here, now that everything's (and I do mean everything) so ready for her. The belly is pretty big to me, but people seem really surprised that I'm so far along when they see me. I guess pretty big for me must be on the small side vs. the norm? My maternity clothes still fit but I am BORED BORED BORED with them and want desperately for the weather to cool off so that I can start wearing the very few fallish outfits I've bought. The hospital bags (one for labor/delivery and one for post partem) are as packed as they can be for now, the cute baby seat is in the car, the stroller is parked near the back door, the nursery's finished and clean, and gets rearranged nearly daily just because I keep going in there to play with everything and end up moving it all around. My feelings about that room and its occupant to be are bordering on obsessive, and I get kindof embarrassed, but then I think, What better to be obsessed with than my own little child? And since she's not here yet, I just go with what I've got and obsess over her room and all of her little cute, sweet-smelling little things!
Food continues to pose quite the challenge. I know I need to be eating, and I WANT to eat, but I just don't feel hungry and not many foods seem appealing to me, so I struggle to choke down much of anything. I don't feel sick at all, I just don't have much of an appetite. But, and this is bizarre for me, I am always PARCHED and can down liquids faster than anything, and I find them sooooooooooo satisfying! Coke is especially yummy, and Cherry Coke sends delighted shivers through my whole body. Un-pregnant, I don't really drink much Coke, so I guess you could call all of this a pregnancy craving? Anyway, I am just a beverage junkie right now - Gatorade, Coke, Shirley Temples, apple juice over crushed ice, lemonade - you name it, I want to guzzle it down. I wake up with my lips stuck to my teeth and my tongue and the rest of my mouth just dusty dry and all I can think about is BEVERAGES!
Something feels different about the location of my little baby, too. Off and on, she creates more and more pressure on my bladder and does things that make my cervix hurt a little, too. Maybe this means she has dropped or is in the process of dropping, but these symptoms seem to come and go from day to day, so maybe she's just gotten so much bigger and so certain positions bring on these feelings. The doctor didn't comment on the whole dropping issue at my appointment Monday, though she did say she could feel the baby's head during my FIRST internal exam since the one I had when we started this journey many months ago. My cervix was still long and closed - *sigh*, but I guess the head being in a position to be felt must be a good sign of progress. Oh yes, I started to have infrequent but noticeable period-like cramps about 8-10 days ago and they continue to come and go. They're mostly in the evenings. The doctor didn't seem at all concerned about those, so I assume they are just my body getting some practice contractions in so it'll know what to do when the moment arrives.
I'm still sleeping pretty well most nights. I only have to get up to go to the bathroom twice a night, even considering the huge quantity of fluids I've been drinking. I've been trying to walk in the mornings as frequently as possible, which hasn't been that frequent since it seems lately there are always hurricane remnants on their way thru Georgia from Florida, so lots of rain and wind!
Al continues to be wonderful to me. I still am doing the housework and shopping and cooking, but when Al gets home, he's always ready to pay attention to me, wash the dinner dishes and clean up the kitchen, and generally make me feel like a princess for the rest of the evening, right down to a very nice backrub every night as I fall asleep. He's a great husband and I think we are going to have so much fun being parents together. I can't see us having the resentment towards one another that I hear about quite a bit, because we have already established a really good system of give and take and a deep appreciation for each other. He just makes me so proud. He's so smart and good and kind and unselfish, and other people recognize and love these things about him, which re-reminds me (not that I really need reminding) of the reasons that I love him and makes me feel like the luckiest woman in the world to be his wife. Plus, I get to see the parts of him that he saves for the people he loves and trusts most, like his silly side and his creative side and his sweet, loving, vulnerable side. So I get the total package! No one is perfect, but he is awfully darn close, in my opinion. I can't wait to watch our little one grow up and find out which of his characteristics she'll have. Hopefully all of them.
We went to a birth class over one whole weekend (Sept. 17 & 18) A Friday night and then all day Saturday. We enjoyed them, laughed a lot, and learned some basic things to help us remain on the same page during labor and delivery. The breastfeeding class I'd planned on attending was cancelled due to one of the hurricanes, so we're just going to do some reading about breastfeeding and then rely on the lactation consultants at the hospital to help us with what we don't or can't learn in books. I still feel pretty confident about the process, I just want to be armed with tons of information so there are fewer things that could happen that would take me by surprise or discourage me.
I think that¡¦s all for now. I hope I remain motivated diary-ward for the next few weeks so I'll have good documentation of these last few weeks prior to our baby's birth!